Limericks and less

V

vapros

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baton rouge, la
I find myself thinking in rhymes and there's only one cure for it, so here we go. Glad to see several others who are not above writing limericks or other short verse, and some real talent has emerged. San Jose Dick is possibly world-class.

Everybody is invited. Step right up and speak into this here thingy. It's like eating lettuce. All it takes is a little nerve.
* * * * * *
Now here's how I look at this game:
It's the balls that are causing my shame.
They don't seem to know
Where I want them to go,
And I need someone else I can blame!
 
SJDinPHX

SJDinPHX

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vapros said:
I find myself thinking in rhymes and there's only one cure for it, so here we go. Glad to see several others who are not above writing limericks or other short verse, and some real talent has emerged. San Jose Dick is possibly world-class.

Everybody is invited. Step right up and speak into this here thingy. It's like eating lettuce. All it takes is a little nerve.
* * * * * *
Now here's how I look at this game:
It's the balls that are causing my shame.
They don't seem to know
Where I want them to go,
And I need someone else I can blame!
Click to expand...

If you don't really know where they're going,
And you're not really sure where they've been,
Then you can't blame the ball's,
For all of your faults,
And cursing won't make them go in !

Dick,

PS Vapros, PM me your email address, I would like to share something with you that won't work in this PM format.
 
NH Steve

NH Steve

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New Hampshire
My opponent’s left ball-in-hand
It’s pressure I hardly can stand
Should I go for a shot
that I might fail to pot
Or cowardly duck, for a grand?
 
M

Mike

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Messages
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There was a time when I had a good stroke
Now it is more like a poke
If I can't make it better
I'll be turned into a sweator
Otherwise I'll be going home broke
 
V

vapros

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May 24, 2004
Messages
4,809
From
baton rouge, la
Awright!

Awright!

:D Way to go, gentlemen! Who's next?

* * * * * *

The limerick's easy to write.
Here's a quickie I turned out tonite -
Five lines, if they're funny
Will win you the money,
That's waiting up there on the light.
 
M

Mike

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May 25, 2004
Messages
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I used to be able to play
But lately I've been having to pay
I practice my game
But it remains just the same
So I guess I'll be staying away
 
One Pocket Ghost

One Pocket Ghost

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Ghosttown
Now you're all vying for SECOND place !

Now you're all vying for SECOND place !

vapros said:
Everybody is invited. Step right up and speak into this here thingy.

* * * * * *


Ok vapros, you asked for it - and I got some gettin' even to do with SJ Dick anyway - he rhymed sideways about me the other day.

Now just so you know, like Freddy, I'm from Chicago, where we grew up with things called 'signifying' and the 'dozens'.....Ok, time to kick some a$$, cuz I'm in it, to win it........:eek: :D



Now some here might boast they’re a poet
But the Ghost is the one that can show it

See I’m not trying to start up no flame
I’m just rhyming that One Pocket’s my game

I know that getting my cash is your goal
But you can’t, with no shots at your hole

I got my college One Pocket diploma
Learned how to put all my opponents in a coma

3 & stop, move-a-ball, 2-hit-and-the-pick
It don’t matter, I’m the guy you can’t trick

Yes, SJ Dick has aged like fine wine
But my mind computes One Pocket like Einstein

Some think they’ve seen the best moves, coast to coast
But they’ve never seen the moves of the Ghost !

When they’re beat they all feel a cold breeze
That’s the Ghost floating out with the cheese !
Click to expand...
 
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W

Wayne

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Messages
444
One Pocket Ghost said:
vapros said:
Everybody is invited. Step right up and speak into this here thingy.

* * * * * *


Ok vapros, you asked for it - and I got some gettin' even to do with SJ Dick anyway - he rhymed sideways about me the other day.

Now just so you know, like Freddy, I'm from Chicago, where we grew up with things called 'signifying' and the 'dozens'.....Ok, time to kick some a$$, cuz I'm in it, to win it........:eek: :D



Now some here might boast they’re a poet
But the Ghost is the one that can show it

See I’m not trying to start up no flame
I’m just rhyming that One Pocket’s my game

I know that getting my cash is your goal
But you can’t, with no shots at your hole

I got my college One Pocket diploma
Learned how to put all my opponents in a coma

3 & stop, move-a-ball, 2-hit-and-the-pick
It don’t matter, I’m the guy you can’t trick

Yes, SJ Dick has aged like fine wine
But my mind computes One Pocket like Einstein

Some think they’ve seen the best moves, coast to coast
But they’ve never seen the moves of the Ghost !

When they’re beat they all feel a cold breeze
That’s the Ghost floating out with the cheese !
Click to expand...

He calls himself One Pocket Ghost
And on the Internet he loves to boast
I asked for a game and he said not today
Then he scampered away
Looking for a cripple to play

(he made like a ghost and disappeared)

Wayne
Click to expand...
 
RedCard

RedCard

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Messages
590
Happened again

Happened again

On nerve in one satchel over my head
A path to the door, devil no longer be fed
Can't blame them for wanting to be paid
But it's early and I still must get laid
Seen it before, now they all turn red.
 
V

vapros

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Messages
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From
baton rouge, la
Counting heads

Counting heads

:D Okay, now we are getting some momentum. Three new ones today. We had Mike, who was humble and honest about his game, and then there was the OPG, who was . . . well, not all that humble. He doesn't make limericks, but he makes rhymes and doesn't leave you wondering what his message was. Them Chicargo guys are pretty scary. We've got a couple that might be left over from the St. Valentine's Day Massacre. What the heck are the 'dozens', anyway? :cool:

SJD, you have been called out - no doubt about it - and there's nothing you can do but go, with everybody looking at you. Don't show the white feather. Get your affairs in order and then do the best you can.

If I can make the DCC, I'll be the guy with the pushcart, selling merthiolate and band-aids and small arms ammunition.

And then we heard from Wayne, who doesn't believe in ghosts at all. OPG might be looking up the barrel this time. Whatcha gonna do, man?
 
One Pocket Ghost

One Pocket Ghost

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Wayne said:
Then he scampered away
Looking for a cripple to play



Wayne
Click to expand...


Hey man, as far as I'm concerned, that's out of line and not in the good natured woofing spirit of this thread - I thought that over here at onepocket.org, we didn't have cheap shot personal attacks like they constantly have over at azbilliards......and besides the fact that you're WRONG - I played Danny Petralba, and Paul Song even, among others, where I had the worst of it.
 
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V

vapros

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Messages
4,809
From
baton rouge, la
Easy does it

Easy does it

:eek: Okay, lets' all get a couple of deep breaths. I started this thing in fun, and I hope it can continue that way.

No cheap shots, please. I'll try to do my part, and make wise cracks only where I'm pretty sure I won't offend.

This is a much better site than most of the others and I would hate to see it with any mud on it. Let's try this again.
 
NH Steve

NH Steve

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New Hampshire
vapros’s idea was contagious
though the rhymes were a wee bit outrageous
but who knew the emotions
would cause such commotions
that limericks could be so endangerous
 
SJDinPHX

SJDinPHX

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Messages
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One Pocket Ghost said:
Hey man, as far as I'm concerned, that's out of line and not in the good natured woofing spirit of this thread - I thought that over here at onepocket.org, we didn't have cheap shot personal attacks like they constantly have over at azbilliards......and besides the fact that you're WRONG - I played Danny Petralba, and Paul Song even, among others, where I had the worst of it.
Click to expand...

I agree with Vapro's, and you too Ghost, we don't need the childish BS that goes on, on other forums. If Wayne is a local guy, (Chi-town) maybe there is some bad blood between you two, I don't know.
However it sounded like he was just trying to rib you. I did not see anything totally out of line. I think this may go deeper. Let's hope not. I, for one, am just in it for some good natured woofing and kidding. lets hope thats all there is to it. :)

Dick
 
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jrhendy

jrhendy

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From
Placerville, CA
One Pocket Ghost said:
Hey man, as far as I'm concerned, that's out of line and not in the good natured woofing spirit of this thread - I thought that over here at onepocket.org, we didn't have cheap shot personal attacks like they constantly have over at azbilliards......and besides the fact that you're WRONG - I played Danny Petralba, and Paul Song even, among others, where I had the worst of it.
Click to expand...

Shoot, I ducked Wayne myself and have the $$ in my pocket to prove I did. He is just trying to stir up a little action like we all are. I'm almost hot enough to play (with a ball). Wayne is in Santa Monica Dick. A great place to play one pocket except they play too good. I heard The Ghost slipped through there a few months ago, and not wanting to knock his own action, he steered clear of the best player. I'm sure The Ghost, like me, is saving him for another day.
 
One Pocket Ghost

One Pocket Ghost

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Dick Mc Morran said:
I agree with Vapro's, and you too Ghost, we don't need the childish BS that goes on, on other forums. If Wayne is a local guy, (Chi-town) maybe there is some bad blood between you two, I don't know.
However it sounded like he was just trying to rib you. I did not see anything totally out of line. I think this may go deeper. Let's hope not. I, for one, am just in it for some good natured woofing and kidding. lets hope thats all there is to it. :)

Dick
Click to expand...


Dick......I have 0 history with Wayne- I don't know him - never met him - never had a forum post with him - we are total strangers to each other....

That being the case, c'mon Dick and John, you guys have been around a long time - are you going to tell me that a guy that doesn't know me is not out of line for saying I'm looking for cripples to play ?.....That's an insult, period.
 
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jrhendy

jrhendy

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One Pocket Ghost said:
Dick......I have 0 history with Wayne- I don't know him - never met him - never had a forum post with him - we are total strangers to each other....

That being the case, c'mon Dick and John, you guys have been around a long time - are you going to tell me that a guy that doesn't know me is not out of line for saying I'm looking for cripples to play ?.....That is out of line, period.
Click to expand...

I just met him at the Hollywood Billiards Tournament in July. Good Guy/Good Player. I think you are being a little sensitive, but that is just my opinion. We are talking about matching up in pool here. We have all heard and given out much worse. I am considered to be a good guy myself, but watch your wallet if we match up. That's how we keep score.
 
fred bentivegna

fred bentivegna

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Signifying and the dozens

Signifying and the dozens

vapros said:
:D .... What the heck are the 'dozens', anyway? :cool:


I cant believe nobody has heard of "signifying" or the "dozens." Those were schoolyard insult contests, mainly concerned with your parentage. ie., "talkin' bout' yo' mama!" I dont mean to brag, but I will, I played that game way better than I played 1pkt.

the Beard
Click to expand...
 
V

vapros

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From
baton rouge, la
Freddie's forte

Freddie's forte

fred bentivegna said:
vapros said:
:D .... What the heck are the 'dozens', anyway? :cool:


I cant believe nobody has heard of "signifying" or the "dozens." Those were schoolyard insult contests, mainly concerned with your parentage. ie., "talkin' bout' yo' mama!" I dont mean to brag, but I will, I played that game way better than I played 1pkt.

the Beard
Click to expand...

Okay, I'll bite. Is there a Hall of Fame, and are you in it?
I suspect this is strictly a Chicago vice. I don't hear anyone else speaking up to say they remember such as that.

Anyway, I'll post another limerick later today, but it will be about pool. I ain't sayin' nothin' 'bout yo' mama. Fist city is not on my route.:D
Click to expand...
 
fred bentivegna

fred bentivegna

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Dozens of Cities know the "dozens"

Dozens of Cities know the "dozens"

vapros said:
fred bentivegna said:
Okay, I'll bite. Is there a Hall of Fame, and are you in it?
I suspect this is strictly a Chicago vice. I don't hear anyone else speaking up to say they remember such as that.

Anyway, I'll post another limerick later today, but it will be about pool. I ain't sayin' nothin' 'bout yo' mama. Fist city is not on my route.:D
Click to expand...

City dwellers in all the really big Eastern and Midwest cities know what the dozens are. New York, Chicago, Philly, Boston, Cleveland, Pittsburg. They werent too popular out on the farmlands. Zeb and Luke didnt play too often.

the Beard
Click to expand...
 
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